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Why Do I Write – A Masochists Dream

I write because sometimes I need to release ideas that have formed.  Seeing the clarity or confusion of my thoughts on paper helps me to sort them out and figure out exactly how I feel about things.  I express my deepest feelings in my poems, and if any of them make you cry you should know that my face was probably wet as well.  My dearest friends tell me to write when they know I am in a mood about something, because they know that writing heals me.  I can't tell you why it works that way though I know it does; maybe it's just a release.

That was the dramatic version.  The logical one is that I am better at expressing myself in writing.  Not so very long ago I went back to college to attain some academic credentials and also to take any and all classes that would help me become a better writer.  To obtain a degree I had to take a speech class.  You'd think I would be pretty good with words.  I have had poetry readings and I've been talking my head off at my kids for 33 years, but put in front of an audience (no matter how small) and all those words I so carefully composed go straight out of my head to God knows where.  Nope, I'm not a public speaker.  I did discover while taking that class that there are parts of our brains that govern our abilities to use words.  In my particular case the area for the spoken word is underdeveloped. 

But that's okay. You put me in front of a keyboard and my fingers take wing, only having trouble keeping up with my brain as I compose.

There's one other reason I write.  As I have gotten just a bit older I've realized that it's all too easy to sit back and keep quiet about something I don't like as opposed to speaking my mind and kicking up a fuss.  But if I don't speak my mind how is anyone going to know that I don't like something?  And maybe, just maybe, someone else out there agrees with me and is just sitting back and keeping quiet too.  Maybe some things do need to be changed, and maybe my words will instigate that change.


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